I%26#039;m 20. I just don%26#039;t know. Some days when everything is still, when we are in between phases, when there is no one to label you, I feel lost. I am disconnected from the younger me. I feel as if I have been reborn and this person is not me. No, I don%26#039;t do any drugs. I feel like I%26#039;m acting. I feel that everything is temporary. I need to grab unto something that will make me feel secure. I am at a standstill.
I%26#039;m confused about who I am. I find this world confusing?
We all feel that way sometimes. Keep putting one foot in front of the other and each step leads to more self-knowledge, more understanding, more awareness. At 20 you haven%26#039;t been on the earth all that long, and you just came through a huge transition from childhood to young adulthood, so expect to be confused for a while! Watch other people, read, go to college, and keep moving forward. That%26#039;s how all of us figure it out, as much as we figure it out.
** peace **
I%26#039;m confused about who I am. I find this world confusing?
All the world%26#039;s a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts.
- William Shakespeare
Reply:don%26#039;t worry about it... I find it veerrry confusing myself, its hard to concentrate on one thing and I want to do everything, yet time is limited so I have to choose who I am now or be nothing...aah!
Reply:Why is this a bad thing? I would say that this is a great place to be. Don%26#039;t let anyone tell you who you are. You get to define yourself, not someone else. Confusion is not a bad thing. :-)
Reply:You know, that happens, and its perfectly normal. You are taking out the time to think about yourself and that%26#039;s a realization in itself. Be proud of it. You need to have this realization to be successful in life and to know what you want to do with your life. Not many people can feel this way and understand life the way you are understanding it.
Reply:Try reading the Bible, New Testament first. I recommend starting with the Gospel of Mark. There are answers for every need in God%26#039;s word. I%26#039;ll pray for you.
The eternal God is thy refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms.
Deuteronomy 33:27
Also, Romans 10:13, Romans 5:8, Romans 3:23, Romans 6:23, John 3:16, Proverbs 3:5,6; Philippians 4:6,7.
Reply:Being a human being you are the best among all the creatures. You are right. Everything is temporary in the world. You, and everyone has to live a certain period of life and then to leave this world. Everyone must prepare for the next life which is permanent and try to please God in this temporary life.
Reply:http://www.chick.com/tractimages59656/Pa...
This helped me a lot!
Reply:Welcome to adulthood dear.
Relax, .... you will get used to it.
You will recreate yourself many times to fit what
circumstances require.
You will grow to accept that there really is no security,
and recognize that everything being temporary poses
interesting possibilities.
Enjoy!
Reply:I don%26#039;t think the problem is with you but in your expectations.
At 20 you are a blank canvas, a world of possibilities and everyone waiting to see which direction you take. So many options are mind numbing. We are paralyzed with the fear of taking the wrong path. We want a clear road and a burning passion for that one goal. We want to bypass the real task of being 20. The job is to face the very challenges of finding out what things interest us and what we are good at. In dating it is to get from the point of going for what we want to understanding what we need. A hip laid back musician can be cool to date but is not necessarily going to be the guy paying the bills and making sure he%26#039;s home at night with the family (yes I know that that is a generality but you get the idea). My friends and I graduated University without a clue as to career ideas. We all had a number of low level jobs until something stuck out that we pursued. My buddy went to merchandising and design school (window dressing), after college, and ended up training as a youth pastor. After University I worked in hospitals doing unit clerking and admitting and really became intrigued by the medical social workers. I went back and got a degree in that and now I%26#039;m a mom and an artist.
Don%26#039;t worry. You are right on track. You aren%26#039;t fake or lost. You are just starting the adventure and will find your way as you go. If you feel really stuck go see a career counsellor and test for your interests. Talk to people who know you well and get their impression. Most of all, don%26#039;t forget to enjoy yourself along the way.
Best of luck to you. We all freaked out. You won%26#039;t fail.
Reply:I remember feeling like that when I was 20. I remember everything being different, like there was no safe place to fall back on. I remember having so many choices to make and feeling like each choice would be such a change in my life. I remember struggling with my purpose and who I should be and who I should become. Just take it one day at a time, week by week, and do whatever you feel is right. You%26#039;re young, live the moment, make mistakes and learn from them. You%26#039;ll get through it.
Just wait until you reach 36 like me, uhhhg. I%26#039;m more confused than ever. Good Luck.
Reply:Your just at that point in your life when you are discovering who you are.
You need to sit down with a pen and paper and write a list. You need to write down who you are.
Write some of your interests, some of your friends, some of the foods you like, some of the things that scare you, places you would like to visit, favorite colors, goals you would like to reach, your favorite movies/games/shows, who your closest to, your favorite childhood memories, what makes you sad, what makes you angry, what kind of creative things you do, what your accomplishments in life are, etc.
All of those things make up who you are.
I would really suggest writing down that stuff. Just seeing it written down on paper will help you on your long journey to becoming you.
Reply:Your intuition is fighting for your inner child%26#039;s right to be championed, defended, remembered, and continued.
One%26#039;s inner child is one%26#039;s soul.
%26quot;Childish be-having%26quot; is not only tantrums, but %26quot;Saint Martha-like%26quot; altruistic busyness in the kitchen.
%26quot;Being reborn%26quot; in this sense is a faux overlay, even a mask. It%26#039;s called the %26quot;synthetic self.%26quot; It%26#039;s not necessarily %26quot;bad,%26quot; but as you know, one%26#039;s inner child and soul is to be championed, defended, and nurtured, in the Way shown by Christ Jesus.
Grabbing at chocolate, a new dress or suit, a hot vehicle, is what may happen, both during adolescence, when one begins to mimic one%26#039;s peer group(s), and also during %26quot;midlife crises%26quot; (Dante%26#039;s losing his way in midlife is classic, albeit lots of words if you don%26#039;t particularly enjoy his poetry).
Would suggest you have identified your real problem, and that you not simply %26quot;paper over%26quot; your inner child, as did e.g. %26quot;Citizen Kane%26quot; with his business-running, until his passing on, in which he realizes his %26quot;real self%26quot; was him as an eight-year-old enjoying his %26quot;Rosebud%26quot; snow sled. I.e., don%26#039;t buy into the superficial argument that %26quot;you are who you are, forget who you were, forget your childhood and childlike joys and loves and innocence, and %26#039;grow up.%26#039;%26quot; That%26#039;s truly %26quot;false consciousness,%26quot; in the sense that Jesus taught %26quot;unless you become as a little child, you in no way can enter the kingdom (of Heaven).%26quot;
So, having truly identified your problem, begin by learning to defend, nurture, champion, that which is your childlike joy, lovingkindness, truthfulness, innocence, and heal your %26quot;Saint Martha-like%26quot; tendencies which have brought you to %26quot;acting only.%26quot; Rather than %26quot;reborn,%26quot; a perhaps more accurate term is %26quot;reformed.%26quot;
If you have dissociation issues, these can be dealt with in a conservative manner by local therapists which are recommended by the counseling folks at 1-800-232-6459 http://www.focusonthefamily.com
Call M-F during business hours, ask for Counseling dept., tell your story and concerns...if you feel sufficiently dissociated as to be incapable of enjoying your childlike love and personhood as you carry on your daily bread-winning, etc.
You might enjoy these authors%26#039; resources and stories:
%26quot;Expecting Adam,%26quot; Martha Beck, Ph.D., is remarkably like your own, in that she realized, about age 22, while at Harvard grad school, that she was sacrificing her love for academic superficiality--and how she successfully copes with %26quot;soul recovery.%26quot;
%26quot;The Great Divorce,%26quot; C. S. Lewis, is excellent.
%26quot;Emotions: Transforming Anger, Fear and Pain,%26quot; Marilyn Barrick, Ph.D.
%26quot;The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari,%26quot; Robin S. Sharma, is a good, truthful, self-help program in the form of an entertaining fable.
For immediate counseling regarding soul, inner child, and identity, 1-800-525-LOVE http://www.klove.com 24/7.
Reply:Werlcome to young adulthood.
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